today we explore certain new and totally hilarious aspects of life...

#1. bushisms

what are bushisms? well, they are actually statements (mangled to a large extent) made by a US president we know as mr. bush. without further ado, let us put our hands together to welcome our latest line-up of bushisms, however old they are.

enjoy.

“Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we.” —Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004

“There’s an old…saying in Tennessee…I know it’s in Texas, probably in Tennessee that says Fool me once…(3 second pause)… Shame on…(4 second pause)…Shame on you….(6 second pause)…Fool me…Can’t get fooled again.” –George W. Bush to Nashville, Tennessee audience, Sept. 17, 2002, MSNBC-TV –Politex, Sept. 17, 2002, 10 PM

“There’s no doubt in my mind that we should allow the world worst leaders to hold America hostage, to threaten our peace, to threaten our friends and allies with the world’s worst weapons.” –George W. Bush, South Bend, Indiana, Sept. 5, 2002.

“Too many good docs are getting out of the business. Too many OB-GYNs aren’t able to practice their love with women all across this country.” —Poplar Bluff, Mo., Sept. 6, 2004

“We spent a lot of time talking about Africa, as we should. Africa is a nation that suffers from incredible disease.” —Gothenburg, Sweden, June 14, 2001

“We both use Colgate toothpaste.” —after a reporter asked what he had in common with British Prime Minister Tony Blair, Camp David, Md., Feb. 23, 2001

“I am here to make an announcement that this Thursday, ticket counters and airplanes will fly out of Ronald Reagan Airport.” —Washington, D.C., Oct. 3, 2001

“Do you have blacks, too?” —to Brazilian President Fernando Cardoso, Washington, D.C., Nov. 8, 2001

#2. sportspeople

yeah they sure are respected by many but for what reasons? sports? or brains? check this out...

“Sometimes they write what I say and not what I mean.”-Pedro Guerrero, on sportswriters

“Sure. I’m proud to be an American.”-Cincinnati Reds rookie pitcher Steve Foster, asked by a Canadian customs agent if he had anything to declare.

"I don’t care what the tape says. I didn’t say it.”-Football coach Ray Malavasi

"Most of my clichés aren’t original.”-Chuck Knox, when he coached the Rams.

“Left hand, right hand, it doesn’t matter. I’m amphibious.”-Charles Shackleford of the NCSU basketball team

“Any time Detroit scores more than 100 points and holds the other team below 100 points, they almost always win.”-Doug Collins

“I’ve won at every level, except college and pro.”-Shaquille O’Neal, on his lack of championships.

“Are you any relation to your brother Marv?”-Basketball player Leon Wood to announcer Steve Albert

“I don’t want to shoot my mouth in my foot, but those are games we can win.”-Sherman Douglas

“You can sum up this sport in two words: You never know.”-Lou Duva, boxing trainer

“I owe a lot to my parents, especially my mother and father”-Greg Norman

“I’ve never had major knee surgery on any other part of my body.” - Winston Bennett, University of Kentucky basketball forward.

“We’re going to turn this team around 360 degrees.” - Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks.

“Raise the urinals.”-Darrel Chaney on how management could keep the Braves on their toes

“I dunno. I never smoked any Astroturf.”-Tug McGraw, asked whether he preferred grass or Astroturf

“It’s permanent, for now.”-Cincinnati Red Roberto Kelly, announcing his new name would be “Bobby.”

“There is one word in America that says it all, and that word is, ‘You never know.’”-Pitcher Joaquin Andujar

LOL, ROFL, LMAO, like totally...

next post: other nonsense